Shit that should not be

January 30, 2012   |  

Dude. I have a pretty strong gut (I’ve eaten everything from sushi to bat pate), but this post over at Dirty Sex & Politics brought up everything I’ve cons

umed since Reagan left office. (totally true what they say about chewing gum staying undigested for seven years, by the way)

Michelle Obama’s talking meat puppets are denying that she blew fifty grand on hot, hot, HOT Agent Provocateur lingerie, but nothing will ever remove the imprint on the human brain of Queen Obama in her frillies. I just… Oh god, excuse me again… *runs to bathroom*

Ok, sorry. But seriously. Even Jackie Kennedy – the attractive First Lady – had no business being imagined in her undergarments. And if on the off chance Mitt Romney takes the helm of the ship that is America, the only knicker speculation that will happen will be about magic Mormon underpants.

World leaders and their wives have no business being sexual entities. Least of all Michelle Obama, with arms like a man and an ass like a bus. The only exception to this rule should be Carla Bruni.

If you need me, I will be in electro-shock therapy. Failing that, a lobotomy.

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